How To Suggest Family Mediation to Resolve Conflict

A falling out with children, parents, siblings or other family members can be the most difficult to bear. Family members have the ability to hurt us more than anyone else, but failing to address the conflict and move forward can result in life-long regret. We have all heard the stories of people who wish for one more day, hour or word with a relative who dies before peace is achieved. It is often one’s ego that prevents him/her from making that call, or otherwise reaching out to repair the damaged relationship. Sometimes we simply don’t know where to start. 

Mediation is a way to address family conflict in a neutral environment intended to support relationships and achieve resolution of conflict. By having a mediator (a trained conflict resolution professional) direct the meeting, working toward peace will be less stressful and more productive.

Below is a draft letter that everyone can amend to fit his/her situation: 


Our ongoing conflict makes me feel very sad. I would like very much to repair our relationship. I would like our relationship with each other to be enjoyable and stress-free. I would like your children to know and love us. Life is short, and we do not always have the opportunity to fix things in the future.  

I have researched mediation as an option to address our issues in a neutral environment. The mediator is an impartial party who does not align with anyone.  He or she uses conflict resolution skills to help address issues in a comfortable setting and help people come up with solutions to their conflicts. A mediator is not a therapist; rather than analyze the conflict, a mediator helps participants take a practical look at how to resolve issues peacefully.    

I have found the following mediator that is qualified to handle family disputes: Alona M. Gottfried [or another mediator of your choice].  You can find information about mediation and her services at: Her phone number is: 480-998-1500, and her email address is:  Please feel free to call her to see if you are comfortable with her. If you have another suggestion, please let me know. 

If you are willing to try this, I will pay for the cost of the session.  Just pick out a date and time that works for you. 

Love, ___________________

Alona M. Gottfried is a family mediator and attorney in Arizona.  If you have questions about mediation, she can be reached at: 480-998-1500 or  This is a general interest article only and is not intended to be legal advice.  See a legal professional before making legal decisions. 

Simmons & Gottfried, PLLC
8160 E. Butherus Dr., Suite #7
Scottsdale, AZ 85260

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