Using Mediation To Repair Your Relationship

Mediation is not only useful for divorces and lawsuits.  People also successfully use mediation to work through issues to preserve their relationships.  This type of mediation is used by spouses, significant others, former spouses, family members and even co-workers, neighbors and friends.

Phoenix Divorce Mediation

Many times, a lack of communication is at the root of an unhappy period in a relationship.  Sometimes conflict is just based on a misunderstanding of the other person’s intentions or feelings.  The mediator works with the parties to discuss their issues in a productive manner and assists them in coming up with solutions or compromises to address their persistent complaints.  The mediator may sometimes act as a “referee” in a heated conversation.  However, generally, a mediator just uses his/her conflict resolution skills and neutral presence to help people address issues is a calm and effective manner.  The participants can leave mediation with ground rules of how to better communicate and how to effectively address conflict in the future.  Participants may choose to return to mediation periodically to continue to work on effective conflict resolution.  While a relationship agreement can be committed to writing, it is often unnecessary for this type of mediation.

For some conflicts, parties can choose between a counselor and a mediator to address their issues.  It is important to remember that a mediator is not a counselor – a mediator uses a different skill set to assist couples.  Some people prefer mediation to counseling because they just do not like the idea of going to a counselor.  Others simply prefer the mediation approach.

At the end of mediation, participants often feel lighter as the stress, which has sometimes been culminating for months or longer, is removed.  The first step in repairing a relationship is being willing to make the effort to address problems.

Alona M. Gottfried is a mediator and attorney in Arizona.  If you have questions about mediation, she can be reached at: 480-998-1500 or alona(at)  This is a general interest article only and is not intended to be legal advice.  See a legal professional before making legal decisions.

Simmons & Gottfried, PLLC
8160 E. Butherus Dr., Suite #7
Scottsdale, AZ 85260

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